Red Hanky

The red hanky is one of the best known signals in the handkerchief code, a system of colored bandanas gay and queer men have used since roughly the 1970s to flag sexual interests without saying a word. Red stands for fisting, the practice of inserting a hand into a partner's rectum or vagina for erotic stimulation. As with the wider code, side matters: worn in the left back pocket it signals the active or giving role, and in the right the receptive role. Fisting calls for trust, patience, plenty of lubricant, and knowledge of safe practice. The code emerged in cruising and leather scenes as a discreet way to communicate.